I know a bank whereon the wild thyme blows [Ryan]

[Remus John Lupin]

Word count: 501
Comments: Remus is in a bit of a foulish mood, but would very much like some company? (Poem is, naturally, ©William Shakespeare.)
Tag: Ryan Mcleary

He growled slightly to himself and, only half-shocked, looked around if anyone had noticed. Apparently not. Good, he wasn't in the mood to deal with more trouble than he already had to.
It would be full moon tonight and Remus was not at all looking forward to it. After all: it was December, the nights were long, dark, damp, and gut-wrenching cold. Especially the length got to him. He was sure he could name more than a 1,000 terrible things he'd rather do tonight (polish silver cutlery by hand, scrape the remains of potions from the bottom of cauldrons, even doing Slughorn's laundry sounded more appealing to him), but there was nothing to be done about it. It wasn't like he had a choice.

It was only just past lunch time and he had a free period for the next two hours. Aimlessly, he wandered the corridors, pretending to be on his way to somewhere, but in truth - he had no idea what he was doing. 'I know a bank whereon the wild thyme blows, where oxlips and the nodding violet grows..'
Remus found it hard to keep his inner wolf in check when he had nothing to focus on, and had been reciting poems in his mind for the last ten minutes, desperately trying to remain sane. 'Quite over-canopied with luscious woodbine, with sweet musk-roses, and with eglantine-' Reading didn't help, his concentration was broken too easily, but trying to memorise half of Shakespeare's oeuvre sort of distracted him.

Why hadn't he left over some homework to occupy himself with? Anything, anything would've been better than this, but he had finished it all because he'd been afraid to fall behind. The fact it was nearly 'the season to be jolly' didn't help much either. Christmas decorations were being spread across the school, all the students were looking forward toward the holidays. Apparently half the school already had a date for the Yule Ball and for some sick reason most of the couples managed to pass under a mistletoe at least thrice a day - painfully underlining what Remus Lupin was, currently, not enjoying. Now he thought about it, he doubted if he'd ever enjoy such a thing at all. Remus wasn't usually one to be brooding and gloomy, but seeing all this happiness whilst he felt so terrible made him bitter.
Maybe he should have gone outside to escape the sight, but then again the wolf desperately wanted to go outside and run until its legs collapsed, it wanted to run past the lake into the forest and hunt or run to Hagrid's hut and annoy the gamekeeper's animals. The wolf desperately wanted to be physical. Remus didn't. Remus wanted to be sane and not physical at all.

'There sleeps Titania some time of the night, lull'd in these flowers with dances and delight..'

[aceofspades]

All You Need Is Love. It was supposed to be an encouraging song. What was so wrong about Ryan that it sounded more like a taunting chant rather than an uplifting anthem. Everyone loved The Beatles. What wasn't to love. But at that moment Ryan couldn't help but hate them. Peace and Love and Happiness. How could anyone be thinking about that at a time like this! War, depression, repression. This whole thing was just a total mess! And yet, people still found it in them to be so damn cheery over the holiday. That stupid ball. What was the good of that anyway? No one would ask her, no one ever even saw her. No one would miss Ryan McLeary if she died too. Yet she saw everyone, knew who to avoid at all costs and who wouldn't be so bad to run into.

There was no room for her to deal with this in her head at that time, so instead of moving on to her next class after her lunch hour she hid outside high in a tree where she wouldn't be found. Tree climbing was a serious skill for Ryan. With her mother having kept her in the yard all her child hood, Ryan had taken to climbing to the very top of a great tree in her front yard just so she could see the rest of the city. It was like a quiet alone space for her. So comfortable that she started to dose off a little. The cold was biting at her cheeks, and her eyelids were growing weary. Sleepless nights gave her dark circles under her lids.

It was time to go inside. The cold was going to eat her alive. Jumping out of the tree her feet squished in the mud and melted puddle of snow below the branches. "Ah.. .gross..." With a sigh she made her way back to the castle. The steps were covered in ice and Ryan tread carefully back up to the entrance to what she knew would be a quiet corridor for the time being. The warmth hit her face like a wave of summer. Smells of near by fireplaces faintly clung to the air around her. It felt so wonderful to not be cold anymore.

Looking around, she saw only one person but his wandering took him around a bend in the hall. Ryan, not intentionally following him, just simply headed in the same direction, continued down the corridor in the same direction. There was a soaking squish with every step she took. And much to her dismay, as she rounded the bend, her muddy sneakers and her balance betrayed her. With a terrible crashing sound, Ryan slipped to the floor and knocked into a suit of armor. Moving away from it and attempting to get back up was an epic failure as well, as she slipped to her stomach on the way up. A groan of irritation came from deep within her as she rolled over and rubbed her elbow.

[Remus John Lupin]

Remus was halfway another sonnet when he heard someone behind him, he could feel it prickle in the back of his neck as his hair stood on end and he inwardly scowled at the wolf for being hostile to everyone it saw. They were probably just going in the same direction, weren't they? He stopped his mental reciting of Shakespeare, in stead focusing on the squishing footsteps behind him - she must've come from outside (Remus was well aware it was a girl, he could smell it). Why didn't she round a corner and go some other way, though. Was she following him? (If so, she was doing a poor job, with all that noise..) He was just about to turn around to demand why she was following him (his patience wore thin a whole lot quicker on days before a full moon), when he heard a loud, clangy crash. It assaulted his sensitive hearing, triggering a light head ache, and the moment Remus turned around, he could see Ryan try to get up and slip again.
She must have seen him look at her and although Remus wasn't so sure about socialising now, he could hardly leave her on the floor like that, could he? He was an animal, but he wasn't uncivilised, right?

Be approached her slowly, keeping the wolf in check that was delighted to finally come across something with a pulse, and held out his hand to her. Remus cleared his throat a little. "A-are you alright?" He was quite aware he probably looked in no condition to start picking people up. When he'd looked in the mirror this morning he'd been far more pale than usual with dark circles under his eyes. He looked a wreck and about to collapse himself, although he knew he'd be able to pick her up singlehandedly and without any trouble. Remus felt like the ultimate paradox

[aceofspades]

Pain burst through her petite body, Ryan's eyes pinched shut tightly. Clumsy fool. That noise is going to call attention and who knows if i really want that. And then it came, stuttering a bit at first as if to hold something back. It was a voice. Suddenly Ryan was wracking her brain trying to place a face to the sound. A Gryffindor boy. Oh he was so familiar... Her lack of social outings had left her with no name and only the image of the back of someone's head. What the hell was she supposed to do? Someone was talking to her! Though it was a result of her complete and udder disregard of personal gravity. Eventually Ryan decided it was rude to lay like a corpse on the floor with your eyes clamped shut as if in fear.

The pale skin of her eye lids softened and ever so slowly the lashes parted. Ryan looked up at the boy, her eyes were a deep cold grey with tiny lightning bolt like silver flecks in them, almost like two beautiful full moons. For a moment she just stared up at him. He was so pale. Was he ill? He did not need to aid her if he wasn't feeling well. Surely it should have been her asking him the obvious question. Then again, he was not laying on his back on the cold damp floor. Words failed her for quite some time as she took in the gaze he held.

"Ow...." Sitting up wasn't easy. Her hip ached wildly and throbbed to the beat of her heart. She was defiantly going to bruise. "Ow, ow, ow.." Her hand was a little scrapped up from the stony floor. Thank God she hadn't hit her head. "I, um...I think I'm alright..." She winced as she shifted around to try and sit properly. "You didn't have to stop...Once the floor dries, I think I'll manage, though that could take until summer." Sarcasm was her best defense and she wasn't very good at it. "Uh... Thanks though.." Ryan had read enough books to understand socializing and flirting and all that sort. After all she was sheltered not stupid.

Attempting to stand was a bad idea. Her back ached from impact alone. It was like being hit by a bus. With a frustrated sigh she pushed her wet hair away from her face and looked pathetically back at him with her large lunar eyes as if to ask for help.

[Remus John Lupin]

Remus frowned a little, she really did look rather hurt. Hogwarts' stones were quite hard, after all, maybe she'd landed badly? Ryan had no idea who he really was, but to be honest Remus had never really noticed her, either. Then again, ever since the whole Saige- business he'd made sure to keep out of girls' sights, as it had been evidently shown that he could not maintain a girlfriend properly. Well.. not that they'd had any sort of relation, they'd never gone past testing the water, but Remus wasn't sure if he wanted to go past that - it was one of those things that scared him if not just a little bit.
He was a little shocked when she looked him in the eye. Remus wasn't really the master of eye contact, he was rather bad at it. He felt exposed when people did that, afraid they'd look behind his eyes and see what was there - so he broke the eye contact quickly.

"I, um...I think I'm alright..." Remus frowned a tad, obviously not agreeing, but not commenting just yet, watching her as she tried to sit up. "You didn't have to stop...Once the floor dries, I think I'll manage, though that could take until summer." Remus chuckled softly, though it wasn't quite wholeheartedly - the upcoming night pressed on his mood too heavily.
"Nonsense," he softly said, "I'll help you up." Carefully, he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and took one of her hands in the other, helping her to a standing position. "Do you feel dizzy? Want me to accompany you to the hospital wing just to make sure?"

[aceofspades]

She felt strangely safe with him. Even let him touch her, a rare thing for Ryan. And so helpful. He was proving, on a very very first impression basis, to be rather appealing. Helping damsles, soft voice, and those get-lost-in-me eyes. Not that Ryan was suddenly swept off her feet, though he did have quite a gentle hold on her hand, just that in that peculiar instant, trust was found for her. Her cheeks went rosey at his offer to aid her. Honestly that was a bit much for a silly little spill.

"Uh.. I appreciate your kindness." Her thick irish accent wrapped around every sylable she uttered. "But I think I'll be okay with just some ice for my hip." Think of something funny.... Something funny. Ryan was funny all the time in her head while she thought to herself. " Ehh...Do you have some??" That wasn't funny at all. That was stupid. Think faster. Ryan was begining to thinkshe had hit her head. " If thou dost marry, I'll give thee this plague for thy dowry: be thou as chaste as ice, as pure as snow, thou shalt not escape calumny."

She was never allowing herself to speak again. Or read Shakespeare for that matter. Hamlet was getting her into trouble, though it seemed that was just in his nature. Stupid Hamlet. "Uh... Heh.. heh..." Ryan laughed softly at first her moony eyes glancing up at him then to the floor then back down again. Soon she let out a louder awkward laugh as her temperature began to rise. A lot of luck she'd had. The one person to talk to her, student wise, in almost two years and she was royally flubbing it up. So she went with a dumb smile. Ryan lifted her eyes and locked them to his as she stayed silent. And just stared at him.

((Bleh... short and stupid, well in character but that's the stupid part lol but I've had a rough day so...I did my best don'y hate me. =^.^=))

[Remus John Lupin]

There was an intuitive feeling that was creeping into his senses and Remus wasn't sure whether to worry or not. He decided to happily ignore it for now (something he'd gotten rather good at through the years), in stead focusing on the girl in front of him.
"Uh.. I appreciate your kindness. But I think I'll be okay with just some ice for my hip." At the question that followed, the corner of Remus' mouth twitched upwards just a little, but his eyes remained a little more serious (mainly because he was trying to keep the wolf in check, that appeared quite delighted to come across a helpless girl). "We can go get you some ice in the hospital wing?" Remus said, nodding a little, offering her his arm, should she need it for balance while walking.
"If thou dost marry, I'll give thee this plague for thy dowry: be thou as chaste as ice, as pure as snow, thou shalt not escape calumny." His eyebrows shot up for a moment. Hamlet. He had been quoting Shakespeare while walking. Had she been reading his mind when she had looked him in the eye? Remus could sometimes swear that girls were capable of reading minds by nature and had eyes in the back of their heads.. However, maybe she had just hit her head.. or well, whatever it was, Remus guessed it would be best to just act normal and help her to the hospital wing. "Hamlet, hm?" he asked casually, simply to make conversation and distract himself from other things.



[Don't worry about it, mine's equally short, haha xP (:]

[aceofspades]

How generous of him. Ryan's arm looped through his, maybe not for balance, but of fear of falling again."Ehh... Sorry. I know it sounded stupid." Damn right it sounded stupid. Ryan was actually suprised he'd known what it was she'd ment. This friend was getting more and more likable. "I read a lot. I'm very lonely." As if that didn't make her sound desperate. "I mean.. ehh.. never mind." She smiled and glanced a little at them letting him lead their way.

One thing she could not get off her mind, the tension she sensed in him. By nature, Ryan was a very easy person to trust or talk to. She was always thinking of others over her. Though her hip was still pulsing so hard she thought she could hear it. "I'm sorry, I can't help but notice you don't look well either." Concern poored from her gaze and seemed to envelop him. "Are you sure you don't need to go to the infirmary as well?" She did want to help him very much. Ryan wished boys weren't so closed up all the time. It would make it a hell of a lot easier for girls to understand them.

((ehh seems like they'll be a little short, we got out all the fine detail in the beginning. LOL I don't mind.))

[Remus John Lupin]

Her bare flesh touched his and Remus had to pull the wolf back almost violently when it felt Ryan's pulse against his and smell the blood under her skin. Remus paused for a moment, pretending to wait for her to steady herself, as he had the feeling he might be physically sick simply at the things the wolf suggested in the back of his mind. Her voice pulled him back into the present and he blinked for a moment.
"...I know it sounded stupid." Remus almost forgot to smile, but he did nonetheless, be it a little forced and nervous. "Oh, it wasn't. One of the best the Poet's ever written, or so they say," he said, half absent-minded as he focused on walking towards the hospital wing, keeping her upright, talking to her and making sure the wolf did not interfere. "I read a lot. I'm very lonely." Remus glanced at her shortly, he had positively no idea how to reply to that. "Eh.. oh." He knew it was rude, but to be honest, he was a little glad when she dropped the subject of her lack of social life..

They walked on for a few minutes, silent, and Remus just focused on staying focused, basically. Why did girls have to be nice? Why did they have to smell nice? Why did the wolf, like him, have to go through puberty and think all kinds of inappropriate thoughts? Was he a bad person? Stop- No, not going there. Focus. Getting the girl to the hospital wing, perhaps ask the nurse for something calming for himself, maybe better to skip the rest of the day's classes for now..
"I'm sorry, I can't help but notice you don't look well either." Surprised by her voice, as he'd been so wrapped up in his thoughts, Remus glanced at her, about to start making excuses when she spoke again. "Are you sure you don't need to go to the infirmary as well?" Remus opened his mouth and closed it again. Why did she have to look so genuinely concerned? "Oh, it's nothing," he lied with half a grin, almost ashamed of how easily lies seemed to come to him if he wanted them to, "just stress, exams are in June already, after all, right?" He shrugged a little. "I might ask for something calming. Don't know."

[aceofspades]

He was awful quiet and seemed a little sidtracked. But when he finally spoke she was happy."just stress, exams are in June already, after all, right?" Ryan was most pleased to hear this, though she didn't know it not to be true. An excited look came to her eyes and the thought of her aches and pains almost seemed to vanish. Making others feel better masked how she always felt. It made everyting easier to deal with. When she found out her parents died, she helped madam Pince reorganize the restricted section of the library. A task that landed her with a few scrapes and a bloody nose or two but she enjoyed helping someone none the less.

"I know exactly what you need!" Her smile was sincere and faithful. "Come on, I'll show you." Ryan took his hand and she pulled him to a sharp left. Walking hurridly down the corridor she looked back at him with a gleaming and all together inviting smile. As they rounded the last corner headded straight for a door she looked to him once more "You'll feel a lot better when I'm done with you." She turned to look back straight and as she whipped her head around her hair fell in still slightly damp tressles down her back, the smell of the sea flung into the air off her dark soft locks.

[Remus John Lupin]

Remus wasn't sure whether to be pleased or worried when her eyes sparkled at his answer. Had she guessed it was a lie? She couldn't have, it was perfectly normal (although being stressed over exams more than four months in advance was a little.. irregular).
The eerie feeling settled in Remus stomach when Ryan spoke again. "I know exactly what you need! Come on, I'll show you." "..Wh-no, wait-" Remus hardly had the time to react before she began pulling him somewhere and the thing was.. she looked so sincere, as though she was really trying. Remus' expression changed from surprise to a frown and then torn between the two.

"You'll feel a lot better when I'm done with you." Remus abruptly stopped walking and could feel his wrist complain at the sharp pull as, of course, Ryan continued walking.
"Wait, no, stop," he stammered. "We were going to the hospital wing for your hip, remember? I don't- I don't need anything, I'm fine." He was feeling thoroughly cornered. Women and their strange ways of doing things.. Remus didn't understand a bit of it.. He exhaled slowly, calming himself. "I'm sure you mean to help me and.. I really appreciate it, but I'm fine. I don't need any help, really."

[aceofspades]

Boys, she was sure, were positivly weird. "You don't need anything?" Her look became a mixture between skepticism and hurt. Reaching into her pocket she pulled a mirror and held it out to him. One look at himself and her bruised him seemed like a paper cut, though those did hurt quite a bit too. "You're pale. Pasty Pale. I don't mean to be rude but you look like you'll drop dead any second." She smiled again and giggled only a hair. "Which is why I'm going to share a secret with you."

She looked at him waiting for him to trust her. It wasn't going to be hard. She was pretty and smart and a Ravenclaw at that so she had to be fairly smart and she was painfully nice and nurturing. "You can trust me. I won't poison you. Besides, I walked off all my pain. See..." She patted her hip a little and smiled. "All better." A lie, but she'd be really great once she could help him. "Listen, you helped me off the floor and refrained from picking fun at me, I owe you. The least you could do is let me help you in return." She gave him a tender smile and sunk her lovely and large eyes into his gaze.

[Remus John Lupin]

"You don't need anything?" Remus nodded. "Exactly," he confirmed, though felt guilt rip through him the moment she looked hurt like that. He looked away from his mirror image before she'd even shown it to him. Remus disliked mirrors enough normally (especially since his hair had started graying..), but couldn't bare to look at himself the day before full moon. It was like he could see the wolf standing behind him at all times.
"You're pale. Pasty Pale. I don't mean to be rude but you look like you'll drop dead any second. Which is why I'm going to share a secret with you." Remus glanced at her for a moment, almost pleading, though had the feeling it was no use trying to get her to stop, she seemed rather determined.

"You can trust me." Remus sincerely doubted that, simply because he hardly trusted himself in the first place. "I won't poison you" That was something he was surer of, for one because he had a very sensitive nose and usually smelt poison..
"Listen, you helped me off the floor and refrained from picking fun at me, I owe you. The least you could do is let me help you in return." Remus was about to politely decline the offer when he saw how she looked at him. Why did she have to look so sincere? He sighed slightly, glanced at his feet and then at the wall and half nodded. "Sure." It would've been rude to say 'no' to her and he did appreciate the effort. He just wondered how she'd react when whatever she was going to do probably had no effect on his condition..

[aceofspades]

"Really?!" She smiled happily. Death and pain and stress washed away in one quick wave. Her shoes squeeked on the floor as she shifted her feet in excitement. Helping people was her calling. She had a knack for it and couldn't help but reach out to people. "Come on!" Ryan lead him into the room, which turned out to be not much bigger than a broom closet. "It's my hiding place." She smiled to him and her eyes curved upward in an excited squint.

A few dusty old cloaks hung inside as she pushed him in and stood on tip toes to light the oil lantern on the inside. "I sometimes study here or read. "it's quiet and look." She got on her knees and looked through a vent. "The kitchen. You can smell it from here. But that's not the secret. Everyone knows you can smell things through open vents." She was nutty in a cute way. It was charming and endearing. She stood on a bucket and from a shelf above pulled a cauldron. "Here... Hold this." She passed it down to him before climbing back down.

"See, I tweeked the nice nurses pepper picker upper what ever potion. It's about twenty times stronger now. It's got a great kick to it. And will surely grow some chest hairs, but it does the trick and makes you feel great for days! Am I talking too much? Tell me to shut it if I get to rambling to much." She smiled at him and knelt to pull out a box. With in that box she kept ingrediants and vials and other such as.

Ryan took the cauldron back and sat criss cross. "Go on sit with me?" It seemed as though she'd made a lot of this potion. Probably for herself. And he'd just have to ask himself if he wanted to know why she'd done it. But most of the supplys were running a little low, and she seemed to mix them all with out thinking about it. A second nature potion. One she'd become all to aquainted with.

[Remus John Lupin]

Ryan's excitement made him smile a little, yet partly, it scared him shitless. She encouraged him to follow and what else could he do but oblige? Walking into the room (they were probably somewhere over the kitchens, he knew the school by heart ever since they'd started to make their map), he looked around shortly, making a mental note to change this room on the map, as it was obviously charmed and they'd overlooked that. "It's my hiding place." Oh, maybe not.. it would be no decorum to rob a girl of her hiding place.. "Ah," he said, a little feebly.

Part of him winced at the idea of fire so close to books, but he didn't want to burst her bubble and, this, kept his mouth firmly shut as Ryan happily rambled on and Remus had no idea what to do. "Here... Hold this." Remus carefully sniffed what was in the heavy cauldron (well, heavy for Ryan, maybe, Remus could dangle the thing on his little finger) and tried not to cough violently as the pepper up seemed to go right up his nose and throat.
"See, I tweeked the nice nurses pepper picker upper what ever potion. It's about twenty times stronger now. It's got a great kick to it. And will surely grow some chest hairs, but it does the trick and makes you feel great for days! Am I talking too much? Tell me to shut it if I get to rambling to much." Remus opened his mouth and closed it again. He couldn't get in a word edgeways, either way, and didn't want to seem ungrateful, after all..

"Go on sit with me?" More than a little tense, Remus sat down slowly, watching her brewing briefly before turning his attention to the rest of the room. The wolf was not amused. The room was too small for its tastes and it could both smell food and Ryan, which only aggravated it even more.